OK, so what’s really going on with Chris Martin and Dakota Johnson? We’ve been getting whiplash from these stories about them! But have we finally found the dirty laundry they don’t want us to see??

Last week, there was a report the couple had broken up after seven years together. We really didn’t question it as we’d heard there might be trouble in paradise. We mean, they’d taken breaks before.

But then came a contradicting report: Chris and Dakota had NOT split up! A source told People the pair were still “happily together,” just not physically right now — Dakota is home in LA, and Chris is touring around Europe with Coldplay for the summer!

Then Monday morning Dakota did something we don’t ever remember seeing her do. She got caught by paps and seemed to WANT to show off her engagement ring still being there. It was pretty unsubtle.

This was all an awfully strong response to a breakup story. But is it because they’re actually still together? Or are they trying to keep their mess private?

Because an insider claims to DeuxMoi despite the “NOTHING TO SEE HERE” campaign, they very much are broken up. And the way it happened was pretty awful! The source alleges:

“They’re on-again, off-again constantly. The final straw was that he packed up and moved out of their home together when she was out of town without telling her. She got home and he was gone.”

DAMN! That’s so harsh of him if true! Did he leave her a post-it note for her trouble? Was it all yellow? Ugh.

Another source confirmed “they definitely split” and, by their account, gave even more context about where Martin’s head was at. And when we say head…

“Chris Martin was hooking up with an Italian model a few weeks ago in Rome.”

Ouch! So why the charade? That source said Dakota doesn’t want the breakup news to come out without her say-so — that she’s “going to do this her way.”

So why did they break up then? Was Chris cheating with that model? Or was that after ghosting the Madame Web star?? Yet another insider said there was a deep divide for them building for some time:

“Dakota wanted to start a family, but Chris didn’t. They were supposed to get married this October.”

Ah. Yet another one of those common age gap problems. Chris already went through having kids with Gwyneth Paltrow. Now he wants to be a rockstar and have 𝓈ℯ𝓍 with models, huh? Sounds all too familiar, tbh.